And…How Does That Make You Feel?

It’s a statement that’s taken on comedic connotations. However, as statements go, there’s none that carry more meaning as it relates to one’s life, than: how does that make you feel?

The mind, both the conscious and the subconscious, controls everything having to do with our personal being. The you that is you; the me that is me; all controlled and dictated by the mind. And when it comes to this inner aspect of our lives, feelings, work much like that of a rudder on a ship. Not only do our feelings stir us, and bring us to life; they also steer us, and move us in different directions.

We do nothing, without the purpose of producing a certain feeling. Oddly enough, we do many things knowing full well it’ll bring about negative feelings. But if we believe there’s something useful in the feeling, we continue on. For the most part, we always move in the direction of that which we believe will make us feel good. Humans tend to enjoy feeling good. Pleasure is an essential nutrient to life.

We’d put our hand directly in the flames if not for the fact that it feels horrific to do so. Pain is just as important as pleasure; it tells us what to avoid or if something has gone wrong. One is a green light, one is a red. We need both. Within every experience, bar none, rests both extremes: pleasure and pain. When a kiss goes awry, the need to escape it, is darn near painful. When a kiss is sweet, the pleasure experienced draws the mouth back for a second taste. When one over indulges in a meal, the body painfully rebukes such gluttony. When one is hungry, savoring slowly the meal before them, the taste buds come alive with pleasure.

For many, they wake with pain already resting in their heart and mind before even having stepped into their day. For years, having ignored or downplayed their feelings, they’re now inundated with a life absent of all pleasure; one that is painful to the core. But when moving in the direction of our choosing, pleasure rests in the heart; the mind comes alive. Even during the most uncertain moments – we feel good.

The next time life presents a situation, one in which your feelings are mounting. Relax upon the dark leather sofa of your inner therapist and listen to the voice that asks: how does that make you feel? More important than the answer, is to exam why. Because it’s often within the why that we learn what we need to learn about ourselves.



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