Generally speaking, when the figurative elephant appears within the room, I’m the one to point it out. I can’t say I want to talk about the elephant. I have no use for the elephant. But I know the only way to remove the elephant, is by addressing it by name.
The way I look at it, the elephant is there due to something; there’s a reason that brought it into being. Heaven forbid it take up residency, so let’s all get rid of it before it has a chance to unpack its bags. But sadly, most people will crane their necks to look around the uncomfortable circumstance, rather than take steps to remove it. I don’t operate that way. Never have. Never will.
These bits and pieces of emotional debris and situational elephants, accumulate after time; making it hard to move around. I don’t want to get my hands dirty anymore than anyone else. And yet, out of a group, even a group as small as two, I’m the refuse collector. I want open pathways and the only way we’ll get those is to sweep up as we move along. One day, I hope to share this position with someone of like mind. But until then, I will assume this, all important, yet unpleasant task.
Not everyone wants to deal with things. One has to have an emotional backbone that’s not only strong, but quite mature. Gladly and sadly I can report that I have both, so it’s often me who bends to pick up the damaging fodder gathered in the corners. And as usual, once things are being picked up and tossed into the trash, they are looked at and questioned. “This still looks good. You sure we should pitch it?” But then it’s mutually decided, and into the wastebasket it goes. It’s an efficient system, when allowed.
I had to resign from a position within an organization due to this very problem. The President of the organization chose to see past the problems that would bring the organization to an imminent end. I wanted to rectify the problem if possible. Whereas I saw a sinking ship that needed repair, she only saw land sitting on the horizon. I couldn’t imagine how she supposed the ship was to skid upon shore if it was busy sinking at sea. As of the writing of this post, it was reported to me that the President jumped ship, and in the doing, left only a small crew behind to salvage what’s left. Apparently, her backbone paled in comparison to that of her crew.
When I was a kid, there was always a vegetable sitting upon my plate that I didn’t like. In my opinion, it ruined everything. But I didn’t like that outcome, as I wanted only to savor the things on my plate that were my favorites. In fact, ever since smelling things roasting in the oven, I had looked forward to enjoying dinner. So I did what any reasonable person would do, I bit the bullet and ate the vegetable first, getting it out-of-the-way. To enjoy life or people, we need a clear path. Sometimes this means removing the one thing we don’t like so we can enjoy those things that we do. In life and love, I don’t want anything standing in my way. And within both, there will always be random elephants and debris. It’s just how it goes. It’s delusional to think otherwise. Now, I won’t say elephants are easy to confront. And, I won’t say dealing with the debris of life is a clean and easy task. But I will say – it’s the only way.