It seems amongst the dating world of those in their forties and beyond, most everyone is searching for – the one. Or at least, this is what has been told to me. Gone are the days of commingling simply for a nice evening out or to cultivate new friendships.
From what I’m learning, singles are getting tired of the dating routine and fodder altogether. And due to such, they’re hoping to see that one stand-out person walk into the room. I would’ve thought that with age, and all the cynicism that tends to come with it, the belief in that one magical partner would’ve diminished. The reality is, not only has it not diminished, it’s intensified.
There are so many avenues by which to meet someone. The most peculiar being online dating. It makes perfect sense though. However, to me, it feels much like that of shopping. And I have to wonder if there’s not a certain numbness and detachment that’s formed from trolling through so many people. Knowing that at one’s fingertips is the ability to scroll through pages of prospective candidates, does it not take away from the one candidate they are currently getting to know. Surely it must.
The human psyche is so often captivated by the prospect of new possibilities. So when using this medium to find the one, does the mind ever fully turn off the light, and close the door to the store? I don’t know. It is a rare bird that does not want to peak back onto the shelf to see if a new shipment has arrived.
I can’t help but to wonder how having access to such a plethora of possibilities plays into the task at hand, which if I’m not mistaken, is to find the perfect partner. An enormously lofty task, in and of itself.
I’ve never thought I would one day see my life’s partner magically waltz into the room. Perhaps this is because I feel it takes time for the person who is hidden within to find their way out and beyond the protective coating with which most everyone surrounds themselves. Often a person reveals their most captivating qualities at the most unexpected times, not upon first glance.
I feel there’s few things more wonderful than experiencing a man once his carefully applied veneer has been removed. Generally speaking, I’m not one for shiny exteriors, in the first place. I want to see, and get to know the fibers that created the person. These are not the things revealed while shopping online. No. They are only revealed after time. God knows, I don’t want to make my purchase only to discover it was nicely camouflaged particle board. Often it isn’t until we’ve taken something home, and had time to inspect it fully, that we discover what’s hidden underneath the shellacked surface. My hope is that when I do, I will see mahogany, walnut or cherry.
I realize that in this regard I’m probably a bit old-fashioned. But I do feel although at first we are taken in by one’s appearance, it is only after peeling back the many layers that we find – the one.
Listening to The Whigs – Waiting