I wonder how we would live if tomorrow were to be our final day. What things would we say that we’ve previously held silent. What feelings tucked in the shadows would we bring to light.
It’s an odd thing to look at life this way. Instead we feel we have more days left than we can count. And due to such, we live with methodical movements. We pace ourselves. We take the things we are compelled to do today and force them out into the future; when its appropriate. We reason what actions are best done now, and which should remain stagnant in an inertia of our own doing. Our mind tells us to live this way.
I often live this way, and yet I don’t feel it’s for the best. What would happen if we lived with wild abandon? I have to imagine one’s soul would finally be allowed to spread its wings. I know my wings are constantly bucking against the walls of my own restraint. Who’s sensibilities are these that we use to dictate the movements of our lives? Surely not our own. Fear, perhaps.
At first this sounds like such a preposterous notion; to live as if it were one’s last day. And yet, I have to believe, anything I feel worth doing, should be done – today. Does it become more credible, worthy or concrete if pushed out? Some day and one day, are words best used for things of little value, not things of importance. My parents lived with a repetitive motto spoken between them, and that singular motto was: Someday. That day never came.
These may sound like the meanderings of a free spirit, but please know, if tomorrow morning your life were to meet its end, then today would have been the perfect day to say all that needed to be said. Today would have been the best day to treat yourself to those things for which you’ve denied yourself; little pleasures, too luxurious for the you of today.
One morning I awoke like every day before it. Yet by that afternoon my life hung in the balance. Even with that life experience sitting as a cornerstone of my existence, my rigid sensibilities often stand in my way. Life is to be lived. God frowned upon a lukewarm existence and quite frankly sitting here right now, so do I.
Claim this day and make it your own. Turn your imaginary desires into reality. You’ve pondered long enough. Action is needed. Action is the time when the body gets to feel the exuberance of faith in action, of desires come to fruition. Give yourself a moment. Think of those few precious things that you’ve put into pause for reasons of your own making. And ask yourself this, “If this thing that matters so much to me, is worthy of doing then, shouldn’t it be done now?” Because now is all we have. We are in a continual cycle of now. Even when we tell ourselves we’ve arrived at a later fixed-point in time, it’s really just a different version of now. I realize that sounds confusing. It needn’t be.
All the words sitting silently on your tongue need to be spoken. Your thoughts are just as worthy as anyone’s – bring them to life. Our soul is waiting for us to release the pause button. Our soul is waiting for us to find the courage to step into those things we feel too grand to pursue. We deserve to live that reality – now. I want this for me. I want this for you. I have to wonder what we would all feel like if we lived our lives in full. No restraints. No compartmentalized, rigid ideas of proper timing. To me the idea of living in full is much like that of standing in an open field on a warm summer day. Open for possibilities. No longer living behind the glass, I’m now open for life to infuse me with all it has to offer. Often these restraints, are my own. I’m unbuckling them. I’m releasing them. I’m spreading my wings. I don’t want to look at my dreams, I want to live within them.