“I give up. I’ve given you all I have. Go for it. Show me what you’ve got. You know my heart. You know my soul. And, God, you know my dreams. I’ve believed. I’ve stepped out on the thin precipice, and even though scared and doubting of my own strength, I stretched my arms wide. I’ve done all I can do. Now, its your turn.”
There are times in my life, many in fact, when these words are the private dialogue held between me and my God. You may question if it can be defined as dialogue as the only words you hear are those of my own. Yet, I need to tell you, it is when you stop demanding the method by which God speaks, that you hear what it needs to say. The dialogue will be there. Know it. Stand tall in your faith.
If you are frustrated, and wondering if God hears you, give up your preconceived notions. Give up what you have been taught since you were young. Give up everything you thought God should be, and allow in all that is not yet known to you. That, my dear reader, is how one opens the gate and allows God to fully spread its wings within your life. From there, let God fly. And when you are strong enough, fly too.
When you think God only comes by way of a hymnal verse, or an image brought to mind during mediation, you are hindering God. Indeed those may be methods, but let this omnipotent force enter your life in whatever way it sees fit. And if your God is anything like mine, it will do so with a bit of clever fun. Yes, while seated beside someone quite dear to me in a Catholic church the words I needed to hear were uttered. God is everywhere. In all things. Allow it to be just that. If what you want to know does not come to you during prayer, as you feel it should. It may just be that you are closing the door, instead of opening it wide. Throw the lock away, and never shut the gate.
There are times when my fervent prayers leave me to wonder where this God of mine is. Then I sit back. I sigh, and remember that God will show itself once I drop the method and timeframe by which I feel it needs to be seen. Oh such a discovery is liberating. It’s also one that dramatically bridges the gap we, due to our own beliefs, excavate between us and God. There need be no separation. Let it enter in. Even your worst enemy, unbeknownst to them, can say the words of confirmation you most need to hear. So let it. Let it in. Let it in.
If you are like me, you walk the walk. Your soul is held in balance with that of your mind. You’ve done the work. So with that, you get to say with reverence, “Okay, I give up. Let’s see what you can do. I give up all the restraints that have held you at bay. I understand that now. Show me what you’ve got.” Then sit back. Have faith. And drop your blinders. You may be surprised by what you will see.