Adjusting to the Pull

I wrote this post in November of 2013. But dear reader, I think it may be useful as we adjust to the effects of the recent full moon. As beautiful beings filled with the energy of All That Is, we feel and respond to the moon in much the same way as does the ocean. Except the ocean seems to remain flexible and allow the ebb and flow. We tend to resist. So, for any of you who have noticed the recent upturn or enlightenment brought before you due to this shift, please read on.

Breaking Free

There are days when I awake with a sense of uncertainty. In those moments I want only to strangle the fear that managed to walk with cold steps into my being during the night. Lately I’ve felt pushed a bit further than I am comfortable. I have been pushed to the point of breaking. I could say that I’ve been pushed too far, yet I know such a place, does not exist. We are limitless beings. I am only fearful because of the unknown. I am uncertain only because I don’t yet know if I possess what will be needed.

But I am meant to enter this place with a sense of unknowing. If I entered it already knowing, then there would be no need for me to be brought here. Instead, I’m being pushed further into my expansion. And although some days my movements appear to be only that of moving backward, I understand that expansion requires both. My perception of the soul and the being that is me and you and all of us is one that requires flux. It must move in all directions. It must be able to dip back into our past and outward into what is to become. Expansion requires flexibility.

But in these moments when I feel as though I am breaking. When I want to strangle my fear into submission and whisper to it the words of self-doubt, insecurity and uncertainty – in essence, do to it what it does to me – I realize that this vortex of emotion that currently consumes me is merely part of the process of stepping into a more authentic, connected version of myself. The times when the vortex swirls with uncertainty the worst are the times when it is the thickest, most hardened parts of myself breaking down. Knowing this, and viewing the process of the soul as I do, one would think then that I am always comforted, confident and sure. I wish I could say that were the case. It isn’t.

After I release myself from the fetal position, the awareness that I have developed through my lifetime, does remind me of this knowing. And after I sit awhile and breathe these truths, I remember that I’m okay. This feeling that’s consuming me is just the clamor and crash of the limited walls within myself being brought down. I don’t want those walls. I don’t want to be limited by inflexibility. And yet, the removal of such walls is always accompanied by the same overwhelming vortex of piercing emotion.

I am entering into yet another phase of my soul’s development, and its understanding of mankind. I’m also entering into a place of many unknowns within my personal world. So I will say to you, and I will say to me: this place – whether it be in our outward world or our inward world – only feels daunting because it is not yet known to us. In time, it will become the new, solid plateau on which we stand and view the world. Do not expect yourself to be the master of territory when you haven’t yet stepped foot upon this new land, none alone make it your home. Give yourself time. Know that you are moving in this new direction because your soul, your inner being, the part of you that is connected to All That Is, feels it is where you need to be. You are there for a reason. There is a purpose. And to enter it you must first break free. Not knowing causes you to fear and fear causes you to doubt. Don’t doubt.

These are the words I will take with me today, because I need to hear them. I ask that you please take them with you.

Sane

Look at the Map

I woke with a strong urge to share something with you. And that is: Look at yourself kindly, today. See the beauty within you that is uniquely yours. Do your best in life, then trust that good will follow. Have faith that you’re not only on the path, you’re steadily moving at just the right pace. Everything has purpose. Try not to cast judgement upon yourself, others or the world around you. Love who you are. Because the package that makes up you was specifically chosen as the vehicle your Higher Self wanted for this journey.

Oh yes, its true, dear reader. Even your less than spectacular propensities are there for a reason. Have you not considered why your hardships seem to fall along the same few lines. If you haven’t. I urge you to do so. Great truths about your journey will be discovered when you do.

Once you notice the grid work on which your foundation is laid, you’ll better understand the bumps and hurdles. Once you begin to listen to the repetitive nature of your ego, you’ll begin to understand the work of your soul. Ego offers the voice of contrast to the authentic nature of who you really are. Instead of believing the ego, try instead to view it as a bellwether. For example, if your ego screams it can’t be alone, know that your soul wants you to experience the peace found only in solitude. If your ego whispers that you aren’t good enough, know that your soul wants you to experience that you are, and it will keep nudging you in that direction. And if your ego mocks that your words have no value, then your soul will keep putting you in situations where you must own your voice and speak it.

If you have a tendency to see yourself as a screw-up, know that your soul is living out this life for you to discover your worth. And it will keep offering opportunities necessary in making that discovery. Problem is, when we allow the fear-based ego to be the Parent, the Ruler, the Judge, the Doctor, the Lawyer, the Prophet, the Priest, the Writer of our life, then these opportunities get twisted and used as evidence to support the ego. But when we look at ourselves with Love, then we see the value in every moment that comes our way.

Look at your knee-jerk reactions. Look at your tendencies. Look at your urges and desires. Every component within you is there for a reason, even the voice of your ego. I knew my words as a writer were of value when I heard the voice of ego laugh and tell me they were not. Now, maybe they weren’t refined to the level they’d eventually be. But I knew that if my fearful inner voice was trying to derail me, then there was a good chance writing was something my soul came here to do; not just to help heal and empower others, but to help heal and empower me.

So, try not to draw hard lines of judgement upon yourself, dear reader. Instead, consider that you are the whole. You have many facets, and they’re all there for a reason. If you are easily intolerant of others, most likely you are here to work on tolerance. If you feel you’re better than others, you are probably here to discover compassion, empathy and humility. If you have a hard time controlling your desires, there’s a good chance you are here to discover the divine freedom experienced when not controlled by the body.

The list goes on and on, of course. But the heart of what I am saying is simple: Embrace who you are and look upon yourself openly and kindly. Within you is the map that reveals your life’s purpose. All you need to do is look at it with the broad eye of Love and not through the narrow lens of fear. Because the ego will look at the map and tell you its an impossible, messy journey; even the paper its printed on is flawed. Whereas the soul will say, “How perfect. Look how the roads go out of their way for us to make certain discoveries. It is so rich, and full and divinely intricate. The ink is so colorful, the paper so delicate. This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Sane

Flat Tires

By: H. Armstrong Roberts

If you would like to know who you really are, pay attention to who, within you, shows up during the dirtier moments in life; the ones we aren’t expecting. Because there is no greater mirror revealing one’s self than the one we hold during those unplanned, seemingly unfortunate times.

It is easy to carve out moments in our day during which we approach people with grace. More so, often we choose those people to whom we show our grace. But when one wants to take stock of their true self, notice what comes alive within you when you are caught off guard. I notice these moments within myself and I surely notice them in others. I’ve watched many a person who professes to be Godly show only ungodly behavior in the spur of the moment when cut off by a driver, a cashier makes a mistake or their child drops a valuable.

The Universe never fails to bring us an endless stream of opportunities wherein we can take note of our soul’s progress; a moment that shines a light on who lives behind the guise we often hide behind. Sometimes it is as simple as an inconsiderate shopper sent our way to crowd us while we try to pay for our items at the store. Sometimes it’s a series of unfortunate incidents that happen at the worst possible time; a flat tire, or being customer 99 while customer 59 is at the counter. And sometimes, its a person who breaks our heart or disappoints us in a way that cuts through our very being. Life offers us small opportunities as well as large.

As you turn your awareness toward the person within you revealed during these moments, I urge you not to point outward and blame an outside source for causing you to react a certain way. More events will come your way until your beliefs are shifted and you finally see the light. And once you do take responsibility for choosing to react as you do, don’t grow disheartened. Don’t penalize yourself. Instead, follow the trail of your actions until it takes you to the point of origin. Go there and sit awhile. Its liberating when we get to the heart of why we are the way we are.

Listen to your inner dialogue, dear reader. It is the precursor to your physical actions. As your awareness grows, you’ll find yourself able to choose better earlier and earlier along the reactionary process. In fact, you will find that you rarely need to react, at all.

So as you venture into this next week, pay attention to who you are – in the moment. While you go about your day listen to the running commentary within your mind. Is it commenting on what it sees in a loving way or is it casting numerous judgements. Try to shift your inner dialogue. You don’t have to like a situation to love yourself enough to respond well.

I feel better when I look upon the world favorably. I feel better when I consider the positive more than the negative. I feel better when I release myself from having to listen to the worst case scenario within my mind. I feel better when I recognize that even the worst person who enters my life does for a purpose. And sometimes that purpose is to give me the opportunity to see – who within me shows up – when they do.

Sane