There are days when I wake feeling as though I’m stuck in the trough of a wave. My energy, or vibration, feels lower than I’d like. This isn’t the worst thing in the world. Often this low part of the wave brings me deeper and closer to things buried within myself. But I’d be lying if I said I enjoyed it more than when I’m on the crest or calm waters.
But that’s how life goes. It has to have an ebb and flow. It must have highs and lows. Because of the uncertainties experienced during my youth, I love consistency. I like plans. My soul, however, must’ve jumped into this life with a whole different goal in mind. Instead, it keeps taking leaps of faith, one after another. There are days when I am totally cool with this – such as when I’m riding a crest. And then there are days when those leaps feel far riskier than I’d like.
Am I doing the right thing? Is this the right direction in which to take this company? Is this the right affirmation and the right design? The questioning rarely ends. And it doesn’t for anyone; not anyone with an engaged, thinking mind. The truth is, there is nothing outside ourselves that we can count on with certainty. As much as we’d like to hammer everything into place and make certain nothing changes until we choose for it to change, that’s not reality.
The constant, is us. The one thing within our control lives within ourselves. We have complete control of our inner being and it’s voice. Maybe that’s why I like so much the affirmations we’ve designed. They remind me that, although I can’t control a whole lot of what’s going on around me, I have complete control of how I view myself. I have complete control of the endless judgments I declare as I move throughout the day. I also have complete control to stop judging – myself and others. I can, with practice, choose to remain open. I can choose to keep pivoting away from my habitual thought patterns, and instead, look at life with optimism and hope. I can choose to view the world with loving eyes and a loving mind.
Its usually some old remnant or mindset buried deep that prevents me from living that way on a continual basis. That’s what the trough shows me. Things hidden within the depth of my being become visible once the water is pulled away. Once revealed, I can dislodge it from where it’s buried and bring it into the light. Almost always, just by my acknowledging something; some little knee-jerk belief or fear or hurt, it begins to transform. And then I transform. I have to imagine we never truly rid ourselves of little bugaboos; scars from our past; fears developed when young; little insecurities that have insidiously managed to metastasized through the years. But in time, there are less of them. In time, we know what’s in there and we know what’s tripping us up.
So these quiet times aren’t so bad, dear reader. If anything, they cause me to put down the paper work, step away from the work table and the designs and the numbers and the endless list of things I should be doing – and return to you. Return to writing. The thing I want most to do once this company is doing what I want it to do – empowering others and reminding them that they are enough, whether riding the crest or down in the trough.