Judge Me Not

We are so much more than the labels put on us or the numbers associated with our life. One’s salary, savings or lack there of. One’s house value. Years of education. Pants size, shirt size or dress size. One’s color should not put them automatically into a compartment. One’s gender should have nothing to do with how they fight, live their life or what type of partner feels most right to them. Who you are has nothing to do with the stats that may, or may not, be associated with your journey. Dear reader, can you sense how tired of judgement I am?

And yet, it’s a profoundly human reaction to judge others. To size them up and then render verdicts inside our mind about who they are and what they believe. I say the hell with that.

In starting this women’s empowerment clothing line, I’m continually coming up against other people’s ideas about what this company should be.  Often, I have to pull back, take stock of all the decisions that have brought me to this point, noting if I’ve stayed true to my core principles – No Judgement. So as I get judged, sized up and put into a box, I have a choice. Show up as my highest self or get down and dirty to prove my point.

Truth is, I don’t need to prove anything. Nor do you. Our clothing is for all women. Even women who aren’t sure if they want to associate as women. If you like it and speaks to you, wear it. If it doesn’t, that’s okay too. Just know this, I have no desire to judge either way. I know how judgement feels. I know what it feels like to have someone take one look at me and size me up, incorrectly.

It took decades to shed the labels that have been thrown on me. Even the positive ones. I don’t like anything that limits. I’m me. I fumble and bumble my way along trying, always, to be my most authentic, best self. And when the impulse arises to judge another, and it always does, I try to harness the impulse before it develops into full-blown analysis and conclusion. It gets easier. Bottom line, if I don’t know you and you don’t know me. It should always start as a clean slate. Let me show you who I am by action and deed. Truth never can stay hidden. So give it time. Then decide.

This women’s empowerment clothing line doesn’t exclude anyone. Because all women could use empowerment in one form or another. Don’t be fooled to think otherwise. And I will continue to create affirmations that speak to all women, and do my damnedest to offer clothing that works for all women. It has been one of the hardest challenges I’ve ever undertaken. It may sound easy, but manufacturers don’t cater to all women. So finding something that works with a size extra small all the way up the line, and looks beautiful and is made of good quality materials, has been enough to turn my hair silver. There is no right or wrong in my book, except for that of exclusion and judgement. And damn these manufucturers like to exclude.

So dear reader, let’s all do our part to make this world a better place by judging less and loving more. Start with you. You can’t offer to others what you can’t first offer to yourself. Try not to limit someone because of their gender, race or socioeconomic situation. Try not to judge yourself by these things as well. We are all evolving. We are all fumbling and bumbling along; some more gracefully than others, yes. But we’re all still on a journey just the same. So be open. Be kind.

Am I a single mother, twice divorced with a business bankruptcy sitting in my past? Am I a victim of rape? Do I fight like a girl? How many degrees do I hold or funds do I possess?  How do you classify me? You don’t. I’m a spiritually guided soul who is doing their best in this world. There is no label or box that could ever fit me. And that’s just the way I like it and God intended me to be. Most likely the same holds true for you.

Sane

What Do You Believe

What do you believe? It’s an important question to ask yourself. Because whether you are aware of it or not, your beliefs determine much of your journey.

I remember one time, sitting with my mother. I had recently given her a powerful book to read. The book had within it many spiritual truths. Underpinnings as to our power, and how it controls much of our life. It spoke of the importance of, not just our words, not just our thoughts – but our beliefs. The thought behind the thought. My mother closed the book, handed it back to me and said, “Well, the hell with that.”

I’ve always appreciated my mother’s straightforwardness. Even when what she was saying was something I didn’t want to hear. My mother instantly knew that she was not the master of her beliefs. More so, she knew her deepest beliefs were not ones of a positive nature. The fears within her had become her beliefs. It’s like that for many of us. But never underestimate the contrast and challenges Life brings before you. Because each one offers a chance to confront one’s beliefs, and either walk forward in them or to see them for what they are; to see how they have been holding us back.

There is a powerful Sufi phrase regarding communication. But I feel it’s valuable, not just during communication with others, but also, for communication within ourselves. Sufi’s teach that there are three filters through which our thoughts should travel before being spoken: Is it true. Is it necessary. Is it kind. It’s the first filter that I’d like you to focus on as you move through your weekend. Is it true. To answer that one must first know what they believe. You almost always know what you believe once you take note of what rises within yourself when confronted with contrast or challenge, regardless of what we say or do outwardly.

My mother was very aware of what bubbles up from within herself. Fear. A life spent in fear had worn her down considerably. Some of the fear was inflicted upon her from outside sources. From there her inner fear grew stronger. Before long she viewed the world through a fear-shaded lens. Getting control over one’s own beliefs, owning them, healing them, then managing them – feels like an insurmountable task, at times. It did for my mother. It is the key to freedom, however. It is the key that unlocks one’s own power. It is the vital step that places us firmly in alignment with All That Is.

I won’t even begin to tell you, dear reader, that it is easy. It’s not. Life is a journey, whether you are cognizant of why you are here. You can either get run over by life. Or help lay the foundation that creates the road. You don’t get to control every turn. You don’t get to control every hill. Your Higher Self has you here doing things that are meant to develop your soul in ways from which your shadow self will always try to run and your mind will struggle to understand. But once you know your beliefs, things become clearer. Once you have mastery of the thought behind the thought, you look at the curve and see why it’s been placed before you. That is what alignment does – it lessens the fear of what’s around the corner and allows us to see things we couldn’t see before. Your beliefs matter. They tell you almost everything about your soul’s development.

Do you believe the Universe is conspiring to help or hurt you, to support or to penalize you? Do you believe that help is always there for you, just when you need it or that you will be left to suffer alone. Either way, you will get what you believe.

Believe in Love, dear reader. Believe it. Be it. See it.

Sane

You Are Love

I’m a victim of rape. Did you know that about me, dear reader? It’s one of the most heinous and evil violations done to another. Far beyond a legal crime, it’s a crime against humanity. There is the physical act, but there is also the spiritual karma generated; an energy interaction that transcends the physical. Causing a wound that takes enormous fortitude to heal. But, like all wounds – it can heal.

It must be part of my soul’s journey, that my healing process be long, deep and hard. As healing this part within myself was that, and more. Yet, for all that was taken from me, I have given back to myself ten fold. And Source has given back to me a hundred fold. This I know to be true.

If there is a purpose within such an act, I feel it is that we use it to help those who have endured similar. You see, dear reader, I understand far more than I let on. I understand what it feels like to be hurt beyond heart-break. I know the walk to heal a broken soul. I know the battle to overcome shame. I know how it feels to have someone steal a part of who you are. Abuse is abuse. It is a crushing blow that can cripple you until your final day.

I don’t believe in happenstance. I believe events happen for a reason. I may die not having understood them all. But it was after this event that I began to see within people. I began to see their soul. And although this has been a bitter gift at times, I still wouldn’t trade it.

More than anything, it blossomed in me a level of compassion for the abused and disempowered that, to this day, is the basis of my spiritual world. Yet the flower had already been growing. People may damn their unstable upbringings. But for me, mine birthed a flower that became a soul that feels most at home deep within the world that sits just behind the one our human mind sees. I suppose it entered knowing it was destined for such a journey, and I know that I know that it was pleased with what it saw coming. Not because the events would be joyful. But because they were necessary if ever I were to fulfill my purpose. And that purpose is to be an example of love. And often that love stands in the face of all that love is not.

The times I have acted in love amidst the absence of love is numerous. I could damn God for such experiences. Having done so, I know what I would hear, “The example needs to be shown to those who most need to see it.” I live for the moments where I bear witness to love.

Tonight I’m sitting with a nice Côtes du Rhône, good chocolate and good music. I’m sitting with candles lit and I’m peacefully, and sometimes tearfully, reflecting on my life. I’m allowing God to unearth in me all that needs my attention. Things that make me smile. Things that make me cry. Both have value. I’m taking stock of how I’ve done thus far. Life is an endless cycle of opportunities. We are confronted with people of all kinds, carrying out deeds good and bad. Sometimes we become the victim. But later, we get the chance to see that we became a survivor. The Good Book says not to hide one’s light. That light is your truth. It is your hero’s journey. Share it. Help another to heal. Help another feel less alone. If you share your bumpy story, then another will feel less judgmental about their own. That is love.

Love who you are, my friend. You’ve been through a lot. And sometimes it doesn’t feel as though it will ever end. Just remember, you are loved. All the things that have been done to you, are not who you are. Who you are is determined by what you have done in the face of those things. Someone tried to take something from me. They succeeded. And it took years to heal. It took years of nurturing. But, for everything they took, I’ve added. My love is more tender, more authentic, more steadfast and true. Its raw and its nuanced and its spiritual beyond words. I remember ever baby step and every far reach it took to get here. I remember ever muscle ache and bit of fatigue. Not to mention how life looks when brought continually onto one’s knees, surrendered in prayer. With every agonizing bit of growth came a feathery soft, encompassing hug from heaven. Every pivotal event in my life has caused me to discover something new about myself.

To this day I cry as softly and delicately as I laugh. When I make love, heaven joins me. When I speak, something sometimes pushes my voice aside to share a deeper truth. When I look upon this world, I see the profound beauty mixed with actions that show how dark people can be. Within a person’s eyes, I see their soul and I see their struggles. I see their truth and I see their lies.

I was eighteen when someone broke into my garden, and tried to take the beautiful flowers within me. Little did they know, those flowers had roots. And once the rain had time to pour down and the sun had time to shine, the flowers returned. So remember, dear reader, I understand. Life can be brutal. But you are strong. And within you is everything you need to blossom. No one can take that away. No one can take away Who You Are. Only you have that level of power.

Sane

Written while listening to: Into the Mystic by Van Morrison (if ever I marry again, this will be my wedding song) and We Don’t Know by the Strumbellas.

Freedom Through Awareness

Give yourself the gift of freedom. Know the part of you that tries to speak over the voice of Source. Know the part of you that tries to tie you down. In other words, know your demons. They accompany you wherever you go. And they’re not there by happenstance. Believe me, dear reader, few things are more empowering than staring straight-on at that which tries to hold you down.

I’ve come to know that these demons that I once felt certain held me captive, are in truth, the helpers toward my freedom. For the point of this writing, I’ve called them demons. But only because they rest on the back side of Love, God and Source. You can’t ignore the shadow side. It doesn’t work that way. But by awareness, the shadow no longer stands in the way of the Light. Instead, it helps point us toward the Light. Think of it this way: how can one know True North, without recognizing south upon their compass?

Darkness being as uncomfortable as it is, one could reason that its best to ignore it all together. But I’d advise against it. Instead, sit down with it. Ask why it’s there. Subjugate through awareness. See it for what it is – a shadow of your Higher Self – that which rests at the other end of your full potential. Use it as a gauge that reveals your alignment with Source. Are you walking with the arrow that points toward True North, your Higher Self, or against. We always feel it when we walk against the arrow, don’t we? It feels absolutely rotten, alone and empty. It feels as if we are turning away from all that is good. We suddenly feel lost. And it feels that way for a reason.

There are times when these inner forces spring to life, and lean toward overpowering. But if you know the demon well, then you know its ways. And you are less likely to be caught off guard by that which you know, than by that which you do not.

I learned that these shadow aspects of, who I am, have the same value as those parts of me that seem to shine so bright. My journey made more sense once I listened to what my demons had to say; what it is I feared the most; what it is that had the ability to keep me up throughout the night. Rarely now am I knocked off-balance. Not because the hits are fewer; but because I’ve learned to look with full awareness at the compass Source gave me.

I could say that life would be easier sans these inner tormenters. But freedom never feels the same unless first imprisoned. The exhale given once turned back in the right direction is deeper and fuller due to having known the struggle to breathe while lost. Demons are often the most profound inner teachers we have along life’s journey. Mine are there for a reason; chances are, yours are too. Stop running from them. Stop misreading them. Instead, look at them. Look at where they are leading you. Then turn around, grab the key that has always been in your hand. Open the door, and set yourself free.

Sane

 

Fall Harvest

A girl and her tribe.

Here I sit quietly on my birthday, reflecting. I’ve managed to walk through forty-six years of life. More than four decades of ground has unfurled beneath my feet. And although it may be unrecognizable to some, I sit here knowing how profoundly blessed I am. Not because of the good times. But because of all the necessary hard times it took to get me  here.

It was shown to me some time ago that my life wasn’t about helping others to live amidst the cream of life. I’m not the tour guide for the Golden Road. Much of my purpose is in helping people navigate and understand the rougher roads and the moments when they’re convinced they’ve been abandoned; the moments when they feel so powerless they’re sure there is no God. And if there is one, it isn’t friendly or helpful. So, as you can imagine, I can only guide along a pathway I too have walked.

I give thanks for the many moments in my life when I shook my fist in the air and railed against the Heavens. Those raw moments were necessary. They were breaking points. And when I broke open the rawness within me poured out, and fertile ground revealed. And in place of bitterness, love was allowed to grow. I’ve been growing love ever since. Now I walk in love so deep its like strolling through a corn field. Like towering stalks, love is all I see within me. And the heavens are all I see above me. For the Light to get in, I had to first break open. There is no other way. Once opened, I had to choose not only what to plant, but how to tend it.

It took a lot of breaking points before I finally cleared the way within myself to start making choices that allowed God to flourish in my life. Hard opportunities still land at me feet; the ones filled with painful choices that require a bit more strength than I feel I have within me. Choices that, I will admit, fill me with tears; choices that feel like storms.

Life on this planet isn’t about living only in the good times. Good times do little to broaden the soul, not to mention the mind. Both the sun and the rain are necessary for growth. So, I try less to push against the rain when it comes, knowing that it is most likely growing something very precious within me. Instead of spewing out a bitter word of resentment toward God, I now try to ask what it is in this moment I’m to learn.

I’ve known for a while now that if I don’t work to heal all that is within me, thereby cultivating fertile ground of alignment and love, then a storm will graciously be sent to help clear away the blockages. I may not be thrilled with the storm, but I am thankful that something loves me enough to offer me the help I need to become who I’m meant to become. Of course, I work a bit harder now to be pro-active. And due to such, the Universe knows that I’m busy tending to my garden and digging in the soil of my inner being, so it sends a lot fewer storms my way. I’m thankful for that too. I also show my thankfulness by savoring the good times more. I don’t skip over them or take them for granted like I did ten or twenty years ago.

At forty-six I’ve gotten this far: I’m happy. I’m at peace. I spend a lot more time alone. Often is the morning when my eyes fill with tears of contentment; not because my life is perfect – but because it hasn’t been. And all of those imperfect moments, the famine, the drought and the shaking fists have grown more love in me than I ever could’ve imagined possible. That’s the harvest. That’s the feast.

Sane

And So It Begins

etsy.com

Finally, a moment to sit and write. You may have wondered what I’ve been doing as of late. Surely it hasn’t been keeping up with the Insanity Blog. Which is something that’s troubled me greatly. It seems my course has shifted once again, though. And my days of late have been kept busy starting a new company. It’s a company built upon the stones laid from my writing and spiritual work. So, in that sense, I’ve been crafting Rebel Spirit for sometime.

This all came about during two major shifts in my life. As difficult as those moment were at the time, my soul – and now I – smile when I look back upon them. I firmly believe when we fail to lend a sensitive ear to the soft promptings of our inner guidance system, the Universe will inevitably enter in, and jockey things around. Much like if we were to continually ignore the GPS in our car when it says to turn left, the hand of God reaches down and moves us. In the moment the move feels like a tornado that has uprooted us, or worse, shattered us. Sometimes those moments are a gentle yield. Sometimes those moments are abrupt. I’ve worked many years training myself to listen to my inner voice. Sometimes I throw the blinker on early, feeling in advance the direction in which I’m meant to go. At other times I eye the road, doing more than one drive-by, while questioning the hell out of it, convinced it doesn’t look right. Those moments generally play out something like this: Inner self screams yes, mind screams no. Enter the hand of God.

Always, always, always go in the direction of your joy. More often than not, a clear view  will not be provided. There is a reason for that, though. Your joy is your connection to All That Is. And, All That Is, God, Universe – or whatever name you like – requires that you have faith. Faith means not seeing what rests around the corner. Faith says believe – then – it will be shown. And belief starts from within. There will not always be clear signs along the way. There will not always be people camped out on the roadside offering directions. But always, from within, you will know which way to go. Always from within you’ll find all you need to be, do and have the life that brings you joy.

Rebel Spirit is about providing you those reminders. Sticking with the metaphor above, Rebel Spirit will be a little bit GPS, a little bit road map, a little bit gas station attendant reminding you that you are on the right road; just keep believing, keep moving, keep smiling. Love yourself. Be yourself. Trust yourself. That’s what the journey’s all about.

Rebel Spirit will unfold in stages. To start it will offer wearable affirmations for women. I grew tired of writing down phrases that helped empower me, just to be out in the real world without them.

Rebel Spirit will be open for business once I’m able to gather enough rebel spirits to help support its mission. We will be starting with a small online store, but also a crowd-funding campaign. I have a lot of work to do. But I know, this is the direction in which I’m meant to go. I hope you’ll join me.

Sane a Rebel Spirit

Go Slow. Breathe.

I enjoyed teaching yoga. It was only for a brief time, yet what it gave me I possess to this day; the ability to better read people and understand the body’s role in our spiritual journey.

Reading people isn’t easy. We aren’t like comic strips that can be scanned at a glance. It takes a good deal of knowledge to truly understand another; especially considering we don’t easily show our pages. Standing before a class teaching yoga pose after yoga pose and breath work on top of breath work allowed me to view people from a unique angle. Not all instructors do this. I have to imagine the greater part of me knew I needed this particular schooling, so although I was the instructor, I was also was brought there to learn.

What I learned, in part, was that we never can set aside our body. It travels with us wherever we go. Yet, it’s so often mistreated and overlooked. We take it for granted. However, not only is the body one of the primary filters by which energy moves through us it’s also part of the foundation upon which we stand. If you don’t understand what I mean, consider the times when you’ve tried to work or pray or carry on with friends while ill. Your foundation won’t hardly allow it.

Also, the workings of the human body provides us a beautiful metaphor that mirrors the workings of the soul: softening allows expansion. Rigidity hardens and constricts.

Time and time again I watched as a student dropped their mat quickly and pushed hard and fast into the stretch. My eyes would fall on them and I’d smile while telling the class that the muscle won’t respond well to force or quick movements; one must go slow and breathe into the stretch to get where you’re wanting to go; give it time and dedicated practice. And thus is true with the soul.

It’s my belief we are here, on this planet, for the purpose of expanding our soul, its wisdom, its level of compassion and its grace;  none of which comes quickly, but all of which, when allowed, provides us a better foundation upon which to stand and a more open filter through which the energy of life can move through us.

Open. Soften. Breathe. This is the way of a healthy muscle. This is the way of a knowledgable mind, and this is the way of an expanded, wise soul.

You will feel when something causes you to instinctually harden. You know when your body goes tight. Sometimes through fear, sometimes through anger. If this is happening to your body, please know that your soul can not expand if the vessel its using to experience this life is hardened and constricted. This does not mean one has to be a yogi master. But one must have reverence for their body, and treat it well. Although the soul does not live within the confines of the body – it uses the body to move through this life experience. The two must be in alignment. Keep the body open, soft and flexible. The soul moves and expands more easily.

Those things for which we have reverence and treat with kindness tells a good deal about who we are, internally and externally. The ways in which we move through life are like sentences on a page: readable, and almost always revealing who we are on the inside, your personal story line. What we fear and what we hold with value. Where we’ve grown and where we’re currently being schooled.

So take care of your body. Stop ignoring it. It won’t go away. Life won’t go away. How you treat these things often reflects how you treat your inner being.

Sane

Beautiful To Me

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There are times when I look at others and wish I could be more like them. Sometimes their cut and dried approach to life seems so easy. A life with hard lines; a right side and a wrong. But my life has few hard lines. If anything, its more like an abstract painting. I have many shades, and many emotions. It took years for me to accept this about myself. It is from this place that I love and write and view the world. And although it may seem like madness to others, it is beautiful to me.

There is a reason we all view and process and absorb the world as we do. Our soul is using our specific psyche, with our singular life experiences by which to carry out its journey. If we were to think like someone other than ourselves, then we would cease to be our – self. But we are unique. Never forfeit that part of yourself, even when it seems as if you are a jumbled mess.

Right now I am going through something that has me turning on end. And that’s okay. I sit and wonder why it is I’m seeing all that I do within the situation. I see life as possessing layers. I always have. I see our immediate emotion, and then the emotion that prompted it. It is the soul and cerebral lens through which I view the world around me. At times it feels like a gift from above. At other times it feels like a curse. Generally, I glide in between. But no longer do I ignore the extremes, either. When on high I see things I wouldn’t see otherwise, and the same is true when down upon my knees, or in this case, turned on end. There are times when only during those quiet moments I am able to fully see within myself and understand my motivations. Today, I noticed something within me I did not like so much. Not hideous. But not great. And even if by doing so it doesn’t save the situation, I took ownership of this part of myself. And, will work to un-wedge this brick of my being and replace it with a healthier one; one not cracked with fear.

But these pieces, those that are cracked and those that are made of gold are still what makes me – me. I stand upon the broken parts of myself as well as the solid, and from on top both I view this world. And by knowing these aspects of myself, by having gotten down and examined them, and continuing to exam them, I expand. I hope that expansion helps to heal others. I hope by sharing even my worst of moments, I have prompted you, dear reader, to look confidently within yourself. Don’t be afraid of what you see. You may not like it. But you can not fix what you do not take the time to notice. Look upon others, learn from others; let those things you admire add to your expansion. But I caution you against looking negatively upon yourself in the process. If you are like me, you are not perfect. That’s okay. I decided long ago that perfection is overrated and the attainment of such is just another form of hell on earth. Be the best you can be. And that is beautiful to me.

Sane

Reach For It

There are those that propose that all one needs to do is think happy, then happiness will follow. Sounds simple. The fact that it’s near impossible has never escaped me. But what is possible is to think the best thought within every given situation. Even when doing so is difficult, doing so is not impossible.

Granted there are times when the best thought one can think is to think no thought at all. I had very few thoughts while my son was in brain surgery. I could not reach for happiness. The best I could do was to refrain from thinking the worst. And that’s what I did.

I don’t think its a wise thing to run from life, even when it gets ugly. Even when numb, try to be present. It’s my belief that any situation that has found its way before us, is one in which we are meant to be present. Maybe we won’t handle it with fluid ease or with the level of grace for which we’d like. But it is our life and ours to sink our fingers into. Sometimes it gets sloppy. But don’t run. And if you do, run toward life, not away.

And if you are afraid of making a mistake, I understand. Life is a serious endeavor. But it is also the playground for any happiness you hope to find. It must be lived. Storms do subside. But rarely do they pass over if we do not lift our head and give them our gaze. Live the moments given unto you. Own even your tears. They are yours. Some moments are rotten. Move through them. Don’t dance around them. Walk on. And while you are walking keep your head held high, reach for a better thought. You do not need to think of clowns and sunny skies. You just need to think of a better thought than the worst. Move up the ladder of thought from there. Do this not to trick your mind. Do this to bolster it and help it to fall into line with your soul.

I know fear. As do you. Most often it speaks the loudest during the night. Not because it holds more power during darkness but because it has more of your focus. There is nothing that can be solved by holding yourself prisoner to the orchestra of fear. It has your attention not because fate has struck you down, but because you are tired and you are scared. You’re scared that tomorrow might be worse than today, and you may not be able to handle what lies ahead. We all get tired and scared sometimes. Tomorrow is a new day, and with it comes your ability to reach deeper into your resolve.

If you are to let your thoughts rule your life, think well. Think the best thought you can. Tell yourself that maybe, just maybe, this time things will be better. And if they aren’t, there is always the time after that. Please understand that sometimes the best in life comes first by way of the worst. Know that. Make it your truth and it will diminish many of your fears, because you will view the storm as the possible precursor to better days, not the harbinger of your undoing.

Do not demand perfection from yourself, nor wait for it from life. If you are to demand anything let it be that you find joy in the little things; that you dig your hands into the makings of your world and shape it so that it pleases you. Try not to let fear control your clock. And if you are to wait for anything, suspend yourself and wait in the moments that make your heart smile. Those moments are the flowers along life’s road. Smell them. Make them your own. Now walk on.

Sane

Subtle Shades of Color

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I’ve given a good deal of thought as of late to relationships. Too much. But necessary as my mind has its own rhythm. Whenever I try to force a new rhythm, I falter.  I always need to go deep within my thoughts. But emerge with the clarity needed.

We all have a certain rhythm. To deny it would be much like trying to play the drums on a piano. It doesn’t honor either instrument to expect a different sound than the one inherent to its making. Such is true with the human mind. Of course, when allowed to spiral wildly out of control, then the rhythm no longer has purpose.

So in my own precarious way, over the course of the last week I had to allow my mind to move along, verse after verse, until all my thoughts finally culminated into a cohesive song that felt and sounded right to my ear. People, each and every one of them, contribute to the masterpiece that is our life. Each has their place. Some dot lightly onto the canvas. Others we allow a thicker brushstrokes of their presence. Looking at my own life, I’ve given delicate, yet deliberate thought as to what colors are best within my life. I’ve concluded that I do not want the same colors as that of my own, as I have no need for duplication. Instead, I want balance.

I’m not a haphazard person. Never have been. I tend to sit back and think about things, people and circumstances. I relish doing so. It brings me joy to dive deeply into the thoughts of not only myself, but others. There is room for all thoughts. And it is within these colors that I want to paint my life.

I have to believe if all I bring to the world are hues of a certain color, azure, cerulean and rose, I would benefit from the enhancement of a touch of burnt umber and a broad stroke of virescent. Alternate ways of thinking, different perspectives on life – intrigues me. So for me, there is great value in contrast. God knew this. It is seen in an orange sun setting amidst a lavender sky. It is seen when the blue heavens sit atop snow-covered mountains. Harmony within the contrast. A delicate understanding and allowing of one another. Nature does this skillfully. I am quite certain, we can too.

As I look down at the palette that is mine, and the many people coloring my life, I am happy to see a vast array of shades. I intend to paint them vibrantly within my world. I want to see them displayed in their full splendor. Some of those closest to me have hues so similar to mine we can hardly tell where one ends and the other begins. And yet, I also have those in my life that always turn my eye in a different direction; their colors being so different. And when it comes to love, I like the thought of having access to a set of colors that I’ve never quite had before. If given the chance, I intend to play with these colors. I want to see what they do when mixed with that of my own. More often than not, the most breathtaking masterpieces are the ones appearing upon first glance to be subtle with their scope of color. But upon closer look, we see the full spectrum used to create one flower, the iris of one eye and the leaves of one tree. It’s all in there – blended perfectly.

Sane