Monthly Archives: May 2013

Don’t Worry

BeingHappy

I could damn myself for being philosophical. But in the immortal words of that infamous, spinach eating sailor, “I y’am what I y’am.” So with that, I question, I think, I wonder. I seek truth. And one profound truth that holds no attachment to spirituality is: Don’t worry. Be happy.

No solution has ever emerged from worry. Whether one believes that like energy attracts like energy, so therefore the solution can’t exist within the contrary vibration of the problem. Or if one proposes the idea that perception crafts all things, so if one is perceiving only the problem, they are blinded to the solution. However one looks at it, worry has never solved anything.

And when it comes to how one expends their energy its a futile exercise. Its drain on the physical being is actually detrimental to one’s overall health and well-being; this having been proven time and time again. And yet, so easily it is the rut in which we sink. We worry. We stew. We grumble. We fret. We project out a million possible bad scenarios within our mind, or set on a continual playback loop all our troubles from the past. It is an odd thing that we do this so naturally when it has no benefit. It comes to us as easily as breathing and yet breathing has its place – worry does not.

Whereas the feeling of happiness can immediately make one feel better; even when out-of-place, unexpected or silly. The cells within the body respond to happiness by bolstering the immune system. If one believes in chakras, the energy centers within the body, those too get strengthened and spin to life; allowing for a cleaner vibration. The body ages differently when one is happy. The body processes everything from food to sensory signals better when in a state of happiness. Our perception of the world shifts when our mental countenance is lifted. Happiness should be like breathing.

But often it seems as if life itself works hard to thwart the pursuit of happiness. I can’t say if this is the case or not. All I know is that regardless of what is happening, try not to worry. Not because the moment isn’t critical. Not because the issues aren’t serious. But but because worry accomplishes nothing. And your time, your health, your emotions deserve the best from you, so tend to them with a conscientious hand. Yesterday was a hellacious day for me. When it rains it pours, it seems. But something within me knows that I can’t permit myself to stay in the rut of sadness for too long, as it’s a toxic place to be. Slowly I will claw my way out of the trench. Or maybe listen to my children laugh. Maybe I will find the fortitude to set aside all my troubles and breathe deep the knowledge that happiness is always there, waiting for me. I just have to lure it from its hiding place and allow it in. I hope you do the same. We are worth as much. Life may not always be a happy place. But within life there is always happiness. Fight for it.

Sane

The Meaningful Life

TheMeaningfulLife

Here’s to those who’ve stopped to notice the life force in the most benign, routine of things. In that moment, you found awe in what others so easily overlook. Anyone can be left breathless by a lavender sunrise, the birth of a child or the face of one’s lover when kind words are said. But everyday life doesn’t always offer these things.

So here’s to you if you’ve ever stopped and appreciated a beating heart; it’s an unseen masterful device, held within us all, each and every day. Here’s to you if you’ve ever noticed the life energy surging through a simple blade of grass. Without being as grand as the moon or the sun, it still pulsates with the same energy. And here’s to you if you’ve ever fallen deeper in love with the one your with not because they said poetic words, but because they revealed a painful truth; they gave you this part of themselves; a part most likely not shared with another.

It is up to each of us to determine not only the meaning of life, but what things give our life meaning. It’s a two-fold question, and a two-fold answer. But it is an answer that will define us in the end.

Oddly enough some of the most off-the-cuff, un-rehearsed, seemingly inconsequential things are those that make the biggest impression upon me. That isn’t to say that I’m not in awe of a sky that resembles a masterpiece so magnificent it solidifies my belief in God, or the earnest words said by the one that holds my heart in their hand. Those things are decadent and when given to me I savor them. But I also savor the undertones of life. Sometimes a simple warm breeze after a long hard day is enough to remind me of the grand, magical nature of this planet we’re on; not to mention how this ever-important sphere manages to stay suspended in the milky way. There are times when the presence of gravity alone puts me in awe. I’m also prone to sitting for moments at a time pondering the force that causes a seed to seek the sun from under the ground. We humans tend to think we are the end all of all things, and yet we are constantly reminded that we’re clearly not.

With that said, here’s to you if you’ve felt the presence of both pain and happiness all within the course of a single day. Here’s to you if you’ve chosen to see the beauty that is within you, without first having received the accolades of others. Here’s to you if you’ve taken the time to truly savor the things you’ve placed upon your tongue; a great deal of time and energy went into the creation of each. Here’s to you if you’ve stood in the rain from of desire to feel alive, much like the seed. Here’s to you if you’ve ever woke early to watch your lover sleep, just because you’re so appreciative of having them so near. Or if you’ve found yourself loving them deeper upon watching them display their frailty. Here’s to all those who’ve held tight and to those who’ve known when it was time to let go. I’d like to think all of these things, the little and the grand, are signs of the universe pushing through us – just as it does that blade of grass.

So whether you feel accomplished or not, loved or alone. Whether you feel defeated or a success. Life moves through you. And it does so with meaning. But what does it mean to you? I will spend my life articulating what it means to me.

Sane

Bloom

It’s an odd feeling, realizing much of life is like that of a house of cards; where so much time is spent building a structure that collapses easily with the wind. Yet once the cards have fallen flat on the floor, and the dust has settled, we notice the one constant still standing – ourselves.

We build. We orchestrate. We meticulously and methodically plan our lives. At times we glide forward. But for much of us we push hard against the current to reach a desired end. So hard it is to love tenderly, to live passionately and with earnest, all the while never holding on too tight; to appreciate, and yet allow only a partial absorption of the very thing we want to drown within; to taste without consuming in excess.

Along one’s spiritual evolution it is a dicey thing crafting the art of detachment. To live fully without allowing the dark cloud of concern over losing the very thing that infuses us with enthusiasm. To laugh with deep resonance and feeling, all the while never feeling the pang of loss when all grows quiet. It is easy to let the emotional pendulum swing too harshly and grow insensitive in the pursuit of self protection. But what does such a life bring? To be safe and sound is not to be insensitive or guarded. Do not build castle walls so high the sun can not shine in.

With this in mind I say – live fully. Unbuckle a bit the reigns that hold us at bay. Life is nothing if not lived. So live. Breathe deep the fragrance of apple blossoms in full bloom. Gaze with appreciation at the sunset plunging into the horizon. Dive into your desire. Dive into your dreams. Don’t be afraid to laugh with deep sincerity. Don’t be afraid to color your world boldly. When the chance arrives for you to dance, do so with wild abandon. And when love stands before you, swim in its sumptuous waters.

There is no shame in living one’s life in full. Shame comes from being given a life, yet never embracing it with vigor, sincerity and passion.

If love leaves you, if the blossoms fall to the ground; if the desire and dream shifted and you never reached the heights for which you’d hoped – know you did more than most just by reaching high where dreams reside. You lived deep in the moment. Try not to worry about the unfolding. Try not to worry about protecting your heart, your ego or rocking the status quo, and thereby missing out on all the splendors of life. There will come a time when all is said and done. So as you live your life, be sure that all you do, and all that you say, is all that is within you. You are that flower awaiting its time – now is the time to bloom.

Sane

The Veil of Separation

There have been times in my life when I have felt more connected with the moon than with any other human being. Likewise, I’ve also looked deeply into the eyes of an animal, and felt a resonance not felt with another  person. I have to believe these were times when my soul pushed aside the veil weaved by my mind, and finally I was able to perceive without hindrance.

I should always view the world with clear perception. But doing so is not easy. Instead, the mind takes such a prominent position that we often forget it is a secondary mechanism. At best it is the assistant to the soul. It is my deepest knowing that we do not possess a soul. We are soul. All of us. And these soul’s possess bodies. It is by way of the soul that we’re all connected. And as hard as we try to distinguish ourselves from each other; as hard as we try to separate ourselves; there is no separation. There is only the veil of separation.

The soul understands the energy of life. Whereas the mind tries to interpret and reason with the energy of life. And yet, as we all know, for the most part, energy is something with which can’t be reasoned. It simply is. It simply is in the same way the soul is. Both are connected to all that is. Within each cell that creates our physical body is energy. Energy is at the core of even our physical manifestation. The soul is this energy. And yet, we set it aside as if the soul is secondary.

We try to tap into it, we try to express it, we try to understand it and yet it is always, and forever will be fully expressed by virtue of our being. But the mind fools us into believing otherwise. I say for a moment, listen less to the mind and more to how you feel. One’s feelings are the closest and purest indicator of the workings of the soul. Go beyond the fear though. Go deeper. If you are without a gateway to this deeper place, ask how you would feel if without fear. Don’t forget that within you is the stuff of the universe. It has to be. Energy does not lose its power once held within the physical frame. Perhaps it’s not being utilized to its fullest potential; but there is no difference between the great energy that pulls the ocean waves and the energy that resides within you. There is no difference between the energy that colors the sky and the energy within you. Energy is energy, just held in different places. The universe is energy. God is energy. Energy is your soul. So don’t doubt you. You are this great energy.

Sane

Catch a Glimpse

I have no idea why it is we’re as hard on ourselves as we are. For some the level of excellence we demand is great. Such an approach to life is grueling. Such an approach is one I know all too well.

But along the way I came to discover that my ego, the mind that twirls with as much anxiety and fear as it does hope and excitement, responds best to a light touch. I am not my mind. I am the teacher, my mind the student. And it is through my loving guidance that my mind responds best. An iron fist rarely solves anything, both inwardly and outwardly.

When I’m buckling under the stress of life, demanding exceedingly more of my skill, intellect, time and energy, it is my inner being that calls my attention back to where it needs to be, and says: Go easy on yourself. The pressures owned by each of us are great. True, if all were to stand in a line and share stories, there would be those whose troubles are small. Just know each of us carries a burden or two regardless of size.

So when the world has clouded over, and the words needing to be said have escaped you; when you haven’t the answer for the problem requiring a solution; close your eyes. Breathe deep. And within your mind see your thoughts transformed into words. Then see those words as sentences traveling across the landscape of your mind like trains traversing along a single track – one after the other. Look closely. You will notice your thoughts are separated. There is a gap showing itself between the trains. This gap is the silent place of meditation that sits behind your thoughts. It’s always there. But you only see the trains as you move throughout your day. These trains fill your mind, blocking what rests beyond. They demand of you your attention as they chug and billow steam. But for a moment, focus on the gap between. Within the gap is silence. Within the silence is peace. Stay there not with forced focus, but with a soft gaze. The trains will pick up again. But now you know how to find the place of silence within yourself. Now you have proof that it was there all along.

Give yourself a moment sans thought; a reprieve from having to solve all the problems that face you. Keep catching a glimpse of the space that exists between the sentences that fill your mind. God can be found in those spaces; a quiet peacefulness. So whether you are ending your day or just starting anew, notice the trains that fill your mind. Catch a glimpse of the gap that rests between. Go into the gap, and if you can – stay there awhile. There will be plenty of time for the trains later. But for right now, focus on the gap.

Sane

Lying In Wait

There are two kinds of what if’s in this world; one that gives life to fear; and one that births hope. So if you find that you’ve become the captive audience to fear, ask yourself what hope would say if it were allowed to speak.

There are many things in life that will stop us from living the life of our dreams, or from being with the one we desire, or from stopping us from taking the first steps onto the path of a different direction. Fear whispers into our ear words that hold us prisoner. What if I fail. What if they do not love me as I love them. What if I go broke trying. What if no one buys my new design. What if she one day decides I’m not what she wants. What if his sweet words are a lie. What if I fall on my face in front of everyone. What if I’m simply not good enough. What if.

But what if we are good enough. What if in the midst of listening to fear speak, and thus determining one’s fate, we allowed another voice to step forward. For a moment, take every fearful what if sentence, and change the ending. What if it all works out in the end. What if he does love you. What if she does too. What if your new design, business or job was the creative outlet for which you’ve always been searching. What if instead of failing, you succeed. What if today is the day your life changes forever. Changes happen both big and small. We never know when life will take its next shift. But maybe by allowing hope to speak within our mind, and letting our inner being rest in the energy bed of hopefulness – the next shift is a good one.

Fear is there under the guise of protection. It is not bad in its entirety. Once burned we know to never again rest our hand on a hot surface. Fear reminds of the pain. And when our choices or fate brought heartbreak our way, fear is there to bring to mind the memory. And yet, fear should never stop us. Fear should never be what decides our steps. Because often fear doesn’t allow us to move at all. And if it does, it usually sends us in the opposite direction of our next chance for love, joy and fulfillment. Fear tries to shelter us and yet nothing can ever be found when buried behind such walls. So what if, when you step out, your feet hold steady, the sun shines and what you’ve always wanted for yourself is lying in wait. But it won’t be discovered unless you walk on.

Maybe today is just a day like the others. You will wake and you will fall asleep never knowing, never seeing, what is swirling on the horizon. But what if it is the first day of your new beginning; because today you silenced your fear, and let hope fill your mind. What if.

Sane

Difficult to Believe

For many years I envied those who grew up in homes like the Leave it to Beaver home. The old television show emulated well the household that experienced no turbulence beyond minor miscommunication or drama beyond that of the wayward baseball thrown through the neighbor’s window. It wasn’t until years later that I realized my soul chose my parents, and the subsequent home life and upbringing they would offer.

My soul knew what it needed to accomplish in this lifetime, and it made certain to send me all the things necessary to get me there. Certain aspects of my inner being required expansion and fulfillment, and I’ve been exposed to numerous opportunities allowing me such expansion. I haven’t always made the right choices however. So at times the lessons have been many. My mind could, and has, cursed all the wrongs done to me during my lifetime. Furthermore my mind has damned my turbulent upbringing, screaming, “Why me?” But such questions are not necessary, as I know the answer. These were the areas within my soul that needed to be experienced. What I did with the experiences has always been up to me. My soul is patient though, and never tires of the journey; even when my mind has asked to be released.

What I know now is that, if it weren’t for all the hurdles that have been placed at my feet, I would not possess the belief system and perception on life that I own. We are all given opportunities; they arrive daily. Each choice invariably brings a set of consequences. And our family was the first set of opportunities given us.

So when you look at the family that surrounded you upon your emergence into this realm realize that if they are challenging it is because your soul is at a level that requires such. You are now pushing forward along your journey where you’re being handed opportunities requiring a great deal from you. The hurdles are high only because you have logged many lifetimes developing your spiritual muscles; you are meant to leap higher. I don’t have the answers as to why the soul chooses what it chooses. I just know that it does. So its best to see the purpose in the ways of one’s soul, versus buck against it and fritter away many lifetimes having to undergo the same lessons repeatedly.

So if you can, view those in your life as the opportunities they are. Some have shaded the lens of your perception in such a way for a reason. Try not to view the easy-go-lightly upbringing possessed by others with envy. Try not to look upon your parents or siblings with anger, resentment or hostility. And if you are absent a parent or two, try to understand that your soul knew such a set of circumstances was what you required if you were to evolve in the way it knew was needed. Look at all of the rough edges in your lifetime and see them as the opportunities your soul requested for your refinement and enlightenment. A very hard thing to do when those areas are painfully rough, this I know. But I ask that you try. Because once you do, you will have taken an enormous leap. Difficult to believe, but true.

Sane

My Father

Never once did my father read me a story. Never once that I can recall did he hold my hand as we walked along. But my father, as troubled as he was, shared with me a few keen lessons in life. This man who was tormented by depression and frustration said to me, “When you hate someone. You are allowing them ownership of you. Don’t let anyone own you, but you.” My father never recognized his wisdom. But I did.

This June marks two years since he died of a massive stroke. He possessed great wisdom; yet couldn’t apply it to his life. Words of wisdom, knowledge and truth are nothing if not utilized in our daily existence. Due to some magnificent teachers we know the importance of owning one’s self. It does not mean to simply feel good about who you are, however. It means to own your words, your deeds, and your emotions.

And when we blame others for how we feel, we are failing to realize that we are handing over ownership to them of our very being. I remember when my son graduated from high school. Moments before the ceremony began his estranged father strode in, and sat in visual range of not only my son but me. This person was an emotional wild card, and the last person my son wanted to see. And when the ceremony ended he strode off; no congratulatory handshakes or hugs were offered to his son; no cards offering well wishes. His appearances had little to do with good intention. His motive was clear. He wanted to shake us off our happy, emotional plateau. As I sat in the auditorium it was clear to me, either I could allow this man to own me via ownership of my emotions or I could choose to dwell in the happiness of my son’s accomplishments and the family that surrounded me. It was for me to decide how I wanted to feel in the midst of it. I chose happiness.

There will always be people like that in this world. Those that want to steal our happiness. Those that will try to own us by keeping us unsettled, or feeling powerless. But it is always up to us as to how much of ourselves we allow them to control and own. I say, allow them nothing. And the same is true when it comes to romantic love. Love them. Enjoy them. But do not let them own your joy. Although you may miss them when they are not near; as you should if there is genuine love involved, do not let your happiness hinge upon their appearance. That is too much control to give another. Instead if they are not there to share a moment with you, allow yourself the soft pang of discomfort inherent to their absence. But try not to allow their absence to take from you your happiness.

Every decision you make is yours and yours alone. Every word you speak must be approved by the judge and jury of your inner compass. And your emotions should be held steadfast due to your inner beliefs, not someone else’s. Because people come and go. During your lifetime you will encounter just as many good people as you will bad, and just as many misdeeds as you will good. But throughout it all, there remains you. So own you. You are your forever constant in an ever-shifting, ever-unpredictable world. Be happy because you decided to be so. Say kind words because it is the true expression of your inner self. And do what pleases you because you matter. And the only one who should own you – is you.

Sane

Seasons In The Sun

There are times when we truly can’t understand why life is unfolding in the manner that it is. Just as often, there are times when we can’t make sense out of the actions of others. But all things are seasonal. We can’t control the season, but we can trust in the timing – even when the timing feels so wrong.

As our soul gathers bits and pieces for its larger experience, our ego and the physical body that accompanies it, jockeys through life. We spend days buried in confusion, then a day or two of joy comes our way and we begin to think life’s not so bad after all. Then another maddening situation arises and we start to question if its possible to make sense of life at all. Life is precarious. At times it feels pernicious. But I don’t believe it is, not entirely.

Right now I’m going through a few things that are as much painful as they are healthful to my larger self. As my eyes water with tears my soul tries to reassure me that all is well, and that some u-turns are necessary if ever we are to go in the intended direction. We are forced to let go of things left and right in this life. Those we thought were friends end up enemies. Careers we were convinced would finance our future end abruptly. Those we love die before their time. And then there are those who plunder the lives of others like a tornado that came without warning. People and nature are similar; at least to me. An unexpected hail storm can fall upon innocent apple blossoms, in the same way the actions of one can completely uproot the life of another.

After a hail storm, we clean up the mess and move on. Its imperative we do the same with our personal and spiritual lives as well. Amidst my hail storm, I’m gleaning out those whose season have come to an end in my life. It’s easy to confuse the act of unconditional love with the act of accepting those with whom you are not in alignment. Use the imposed time-out of a hail storm, and the subsequent clean-up, to glean out those with whom you do not resonate. A tree thinks little of ending its season once it knows it has done what it was meant to do. Thus is true of relationships. Thus is true with certain life situations. There will be those seasons that last your entire journey. And then there are those that are brief. Never force a short season into becoming one that is ever-lasting. It will falter, as it wasn’t created for that purpose. It doesn’t have the necessary stamina or depth to bear fruit for a lifetime. So let it go. Allow it to end.

If you have found yourself emerging from a hail storm, amidst a hail storm or are standing watching the dark clouds move closer in your direction – try not to despair. The apple tree will blossom again, and so will you. These disruptions are one of the many seasons of life. They happen due to no fault of your own. You will emerge. Look at it as the chaos needed to kick up the dust in your life. Once all is up in the air, you are able to see things you wouldn’t have seen otherwise. Now clean things up. Its time to remove a few things, so that when things blossom again, there’s room for the good fruit to grow. And through your tears or through your tension, try to smile knowing that as much as there are seasons of darkness, there will be seasons in the sun.

Sane

Passion. Courage. Faith.

Much is revealed during a simple conversation. Such was the case during my interview with Ms. Goodyear from Lovett Publishing.

In my humble opinion, this is a good time to be alive. The enlightenment of mankind is becoming quite evident. Possibly due to the heavy contrast between those that are and those that are not, but also from watching those that have shifted from merely living a life of object focus to inner focus.

Lovett Publishing is more than a publisher, as they recognize that it is through this inner focus that one achieves their greatest success. They haven’t once set aside their soul due to the necessity of business. And due to such, I hope they will always be a colleague of mine. Like attracts like, they say. No doubt that is why Lovett Publishing and I have formed a wonderful relationship. Below is the link to my recent interview with them. If you want to know a bit more about me, the writer, the person, then please read on.

Sane

World Within Her Mind. An interview with Samantha Hoffman by R.A. Goodyear